In today’s digital world, dating often starts with a swipe. Apps have become the main way people meet especially in the West. But not everywhere has followed that trend in the same way. If you're someone who remembers the vibe of dating in 1990s America meeting someone at a coffee shop, a party, or through friends, you might be surprised where that feeling still exists.
Let’s talk about Bangkok and Berlin. Two global cities. Both buzzing with nightlife, full of young people, and deeply international. But when it comes to dating and relationships, they feel like different planets.
Berlin: The App-First Capital
Berlin is modern, progressive, and proudly independent. People are open-minded, casual, and fiercely individual. But when it comes to dating, it’s a digital-first city. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, you name it; are where most interactions start.
There’s a logic to it. Berlin is a city where people move around a lot. Many are expats, artists, remote workers, or students. Social circles change fast. Apps make it easy to meet without needing much effort.
But that convenience comes with trade-offs:
- Low investment: Many dates feel more like interviews or “vibe checks.”
- Flaky culture: Ghosting is common, and few people are actively looking for something serious.
- Transactional feel: It’s not unusual to feel like you’re part of someone’s weekly checklist.
It’s not that people in Berlin aren’t kind or interesting they are. But the dating culture often feels surface-level. People keep their emotional guard up. Connection takes time, and not many stick around long enough for that to happen.
Bangkok: Where Dating Feels More Human
Now enter Bangkok. A huge, modern Asian city with all the malls, cafes, and nightlife you could want. But underneath the busy city life is a culture still shaped by tradition and family values.
People still meet organically here. Striking up conversations in a cafe or market doesn’t feel weird—it’s expected. Friends introduce friends. Eye contact means something. Smiles open doors.
Key differences you’ll feel:
- Warmth and approachability: People are open to small talk and polite flirting.
- Traditional values: There’s still an emphasis on relationships, not just “hookups.”
- Slower pace: Dating isn’t rushed. There’s more room to actually get to know someone.
Yes, dating apps exist here too but they’re not the only game in town. And when people do use them, it often leads to real conversations and genuine interest. There's also a subtle expectation of respect and long-term thinking, even in casual settings.
Cultural Contrasts: What It Says About Society
At the heart of this difference is culture. Berlin reflects the modern West high on freedom, low on commitment. Bangkok, while modern, still holds onto the social glue of tradition, community, and family influence.
In Berlin, the individual is king. In Bangkok, relationships still matter,not just romantically, but socially.
This doesn’t mean one is “better.” But if you’re looking for something that feels more organic, emotionally grounded, and similar to how people dated before smartphones took over.Bangkok might surprise you.
What Can We Learn From This?
If you’re frustrated with modern dating in the West, it’s not just you. It’s the system. When dating becomes app-driven, people become disposable. And when everything is “efficient,” romance loses its magic.
But the good news? It doesn’t have to be that way. Here are a few takeaways:
- Travel with your eyes open: Some cultures still value connection over convenience.
- Don’t underestimate real-life interactions: A smile in a bookstore can beat 100 swipes.
- Know your dating goals: If you’re craving depth, seek out places that encourage it.
- Adopt a hybrid mindset: Use apps if needed but don’t depend on them alone.
Final Thoughts
Dating today can feel confusing and draining. But it’s also more global than ever. Cities like Bangkok still offer a glimpse of what dating used to feel like human, hopeful, and built on real-world charm.
If Berlin shows us what the future looks like, Bangkok reminds us of what we’ve left behind. Sometimes, the old ways weren’t so bad after all.
🖊: Remi Smith
🏠: Bangkok
🌎: Thailand,